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Parenting

 "If you bungle raising your children,  I don't think what else you do matters very much".
  --  Jackie Kennedy

Learn how to:
Raise children imbued with compassion, tolerance, kindness and joy.
Communicate with your children peacefully.
Set appropriate and developmentally correct limits.
Help your child through tough times and difficult situations.
Learn the difference between discipline and punishment.

Principles of Conscious Parenting

Conscious Parents fill their child's need for holding, soothing, and physical contact and do not worry about "spoiling" their baby with too much attention and affection.

Conscious Parents protect their children from danger at all times, including monitoring the things their children see on television and in the media. On the other hand, they do not attempt to shield or prevent all their child's mistakes or conflicts. Teaching our children self-reliance is part of our job as well as protecting them.

Conscious parents know the difference between praise and encouragement. 

Conscious Parents understand age-appropriate behavior and don't scold their children when they act "like a child" nor do they push them through development stages. Conscious Parents do not punish their children for behavior that is part of normal development, such as thumb sucking, separation fears or toilet training.

Conscious Parents express each correction of misbehavior as a clear and concrete rule and state the acceptable or appropriate behavior. Children need to know what is expected.  For example, "You may look at these books or play with these blocks while I am on the phone".  Expectations are stated in a positive, not negative sentence, as in, "You need to walk here, it's slippery" instead of "Don't run". Or, "You need to use a quiet voice in this room" instead of "Don't yell".

Conscious Parents ignore unimportant or irrelevant misbehavior and avoid constant criticismThey reward positive behavior, and "catch them being good"! They focus on the behavior they do like, not the behavior they disapprove of.

Conscious Parents apply rules consistently. Once rules are agreed upon, it may help to write them down. Try to stick to them.

The most important rule of all; Model the behavior you want from you child.  Your child is watching you to learn what it is to be a person in the world. Conscious Parents do not enforce a "do as I say, not as I do" mentality. Discontinue physical punishment. Physical punishment teaches children that it is OK to be aggressive, teaches "might is right" and builds resentment toward you the parent.  Correct with love. Talk to your child the way you would like to be spoken to.

The Ultimate Parenting Course


DECEMBER TELECLASS

December 13, 2011

6pm PST/9p EST

Catherine De Monte, LMFT
I am honored to be a part of this masterful parenting course that is changing lives! The Ultimate Parenting Course is a home study program that gives you 8 videos/8 themes and a downloadable Handbook with action exercises. Twenty experts, widely considered the best in their field in progressive parenting, are interspersed in these 8 themes bringing you the best of today’s parent education together in one program. There are bonus videos for this course as well. The course content is derived from exclusive interviews and written material from a cadre of seasoned experts, distilling the best of their collective knowledge in one place. Upon purchase of this course, you will receive a password-protected link to view your first two videos and download the Handbook, Section I. You will receive two videos and the corresponding Handbook weekly, as well as your bonus videos. You can get more info. on the course or read about other parenting aids at the ultimate parenting bookstore at this link:
http://ultimateparentingcourse.com/store/?ap_id=cathdemonte

Catherine's Recommended Parenting Books List

This is a list of parenting books that I have personally enjoyed and gained a lot of wisdom and support from.  When I pass any of these particular books on to others, I hear extremely favorable feedback about them.  If it takes a village to raise a child, then consider books by experts in the field to be a part of that village. These books provide the guidance and support we seek when parenting questions arise.  I have taken the trouble out of finding a book out of the thousands on the subject that might help support you in your  journey as a parent by providing you this list of some of the best, most well-thought-out, informative  guidance books on the sometimes confusing task of parenting. These books are consistent with the philosophy of Conscious Parenting, which I developed. 

Powell Books.com is a good resource for purchasing these if you want to review or purchase any of these. 

Endangered: Your Child In a Hostile World. By Johann Arnold

You Are Your Child's First Teacher. By Rahima Baldwin

Whole Parent/Whole Child . By Polly Berrien Berends

STEP: Systematic Training for Effective Parenting: The Parent's Handbook. Dinkmeyer, et. Al

The Hurried ChildMiseducation: Preschoolers at RiskAll Grown Up and No Place to Go;  Teenagers in CrisisSympathetic Understanding of the Child.  by David Elkind

Raising A Son; Parents & The Making of A Healthy Man

Raising A Daughter. By Don & Jeanne Elium

The Magic Years:  Understanding and Handling the Problems of Early Childhood. By Selma Fraiberg

Everyday Blessings:  The Inner Work of Mindful Parenting. By Myla Kabat-Zin and Jon Kabat Zin

How To Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk. (and others) By Faber & Mazlish

Bonding:  Building the Foundations of Secure Attachment and Independence. By Marshall Klaus, John Kennel and Phyllis Klaus

Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids
(and more) Dr. Laura Markham (Highly Recommend!)

The Soul of Discipline., Simplicity Parenting., and more (Highly Recommend!) By Kim Payne

The Whole Brain Child (with Dr. Tina Bryson).,  Parenting From the Inside Out:  How A Deeper Self-Understanding Can Help You Raise Children Who Thrive., and more.(Highly Recommend!)  By Daniel Siegel, M.D 

The Aware Baby  and  Helping Young Children Flourish. By Aletha Solter, Ph.D